Celebrations, Dracula, This and That.
We start with quotes:
"Who made America leader of the free world? I voted for Belgium" Eddie Izzard.
It was Diebold, Eddie, sorry.
It was Diebold, Eddie, sorry.
“You know a society has been abandoned by God when it celebrates lesbian sex.”
This was broadcast over the air by some bible thumper the other day under the auspices of Dolan or whatever the hell is name is (I’m not going to bother to go look it up cause it’s not important and there are better things to do with my time) now there are a few things that came to my mind (other than the man is a homophobic bigot) reading this statement.
Did the abandonment by God cause the celebration of lesbian sex? (Man I am going to get a lot of porn surfing hits today for this topic) I mean is this a symptom rather than a cause? And then what was the cause? Is there anything else we should look out for? Locusts with hair like women or some such? Paris Hilton going to and then getting let out of jail? The election of a man child nitwit to President? The flooding of a major city? Come on guys – I want to know.
And just what do you mean celebrates lesbian sex? How is that being done? Is there a parade? Did I miss it? Speaking as typical male this is something I can get behind (as long as the women are good looking and there is someone around to video tape it). As a side note I remember reading one of the psychological tests or indicators for being Hetro is how you respond to lesbian porn or erotica or what ever you call it – seems the more, shall we say, enthused you are by it the more toward the hetro end of the Kinsey index you are (other factors of course join in as well) End Side note.
Anyway if there is going to be a parade somebody let me know. I have to buy a camera.
Finally saw Dracula AD 1972 and well eh. Now this is a film a little celebration of lesbian sex would have helped enormously. As it is we have Christopher Lee as Dracula (he actually doesn’t do all that much in the film) and Peter Cushing as a descendant of the Van Helsing who drove a stake (a wagon wheel spoke as it were – don’t ask) through Drac’s heart in 1872.
As you know it’s hard to kill off a good bad man so we find ourselves in 1972 – where a bunch of hippies (in 72?) looking for kicks led by one Johnny Alucard (Dracula backwards ooooooooooo spooky) perform a black mass (with a tape machine playing groovy spooky music) and end up re-awakening the count.
Turns out Johnny is a descendant of one of Dracula’s servants and has been waiting for the right moment – why 1972 is the one is never said.
Anyway – the film becomes Dracula among the hippies – and is pretty silly and dated and dull – it’s not as awful as other films on the Monster Times list of worst monster movies made but it really doesn’t work at all. Cushing does his usual good job – Lee while menacing doesn’t have enough to do (henchmen do most of the heavy lifting) and the ever lovely Caroline Murno is absolutely wasted as the count's first victim after the silly back mass .
I don’t know what the hell it is about the Hammer folks – all the heroines have to be blonde – you see a dark haired girl in the film – you know she’s dead meat. The Female lead by the way is supposed to be Peter Cushing’s granddaughter – but unless his son married a very blonde Swedish model I can’t see it. It’s not quite as a bad as Claude Rains being Lon Chaney’s father in the Wolf Man but its pretty bad.
Caroline is oddly enough best known for her role as Dr Phibes Dead wife in the two Dr. Phibes Movies. Well all she had to do was nothing which she did very well.
All told while Lee and Peter do their standard good job – or at least play it straight – the whole thing is just too much. The scene in the 60’s/70’s moved like lightning especially in England – hell by 72 it was metal and glam rock – not hippies. And the rest of the actors aren’t really very good – the women are pretty enough but the film really becomes kind of a weird too hip version of leave it to beaver “Beave did you raise Dracula from the dead and did he turn Wally into one of his undead servant?” “Yes mom” "well that means I'll have to drive a wooden stake through his heart, cut his head off and stuff his mouth full of garlic then. And that means I have go back to the store for more garlic and that means dinner will be late" "Sorry Mom" – it really does sound a bit like that.
Putting a vampire into a modern setting was done a lot better in the TV Movie The Night Stalker which was set in Los Vegas oddly enough in 1972. The advantage they had here was that the vampire wasn’t Dracula so they could allow the reporter time to put the case together rather than deal with the dull jabbering of Van Helsing (Peter tries but there isn’t a lot he can do with the lines he’s given).
Anyway off to go write the book of the musical (or start the damn thing) with The Enemy Below - tonight – I’ve never done this kind of writing before so it’s going to interesting a challenge really – I’m okay with one liners but otherwise? Not so hot. We’ll see what goes.
I understand the President had a little stomach trouble and was unable to join the rest of the leaders at the G-8 breakfast. Unkind minds say too drunk to leave the room.
As further poof that in this day and age you worst nightmare can come true at any moment a couple were fixing dinner when the door was smashed down – flash grenades when off and 15 heavily armed police from the narcotics squad bust in – in the resulting scuffle the husband was kicked in the groin and both husband and wife were handcuffed.
Later it was discovered the cops had hit the wrong address.
Peace, Love, Caroline Munro
This was broadcast over the air by some bible thumper the other day under the auspices of Dolan or whatever the hell is name is (I’m not going to bother to go look it up cause it’s not important and there are better things to do with my time) now there are a few things that came to my mind (other than the man is a homophobic bigot) reading this statement.
Did the abandonment by God cause the celebration of lesbian sex? (Man I am going to get a lot of porn surfing hits today for this topic) I mean is this a symptom rather than a cause? And then what was the cause? Is there anything else we should look out for? Locusts with hair like women or some such? Paris Hilton going to and then getting let out of jail? The election of a man child nitwit to President? The flooding of a major city? Come on guys – I want to know.
And just what do you mean celebrates lesbian sex? How is that being done? Is there a parade? Did I miss it? Speaking as typical male this is something I can get behind (as long as the women are good looking and there is someone around to video tape it). As a side note I remember reading one of the psychological tests or indicators for being Hetro is how you respond to lesbian porn or erotica or what ever you call it – seems the more, shall we say, enthused you are by it the more toward the hetro end of the Kinsey index you are (other factors of course join in as well) End Side note.
Anyway if there is going to be a parade somebody let me know. I have to buy a camera.
Finally saw Dracula AD 1972 and well eh. Now this is a film a little celebration of lesbian sex would have helped enormously. As it is we have Christopher Lee as Dracula (he actually doesn’t do all that much in the film) and Peter Cushing as a descendant of the Van Helsing who drove a stake (a wagon wheel spoke as it were – don’t ask) through Drac’s heart in 1872.
As you know it’s hard to kill off a good bad man so we find ourselves in 1972 – where a bunch of hippies (in 72?) looking for kicks led by one Johnny Alucard (Dracula backwards ooooooooooo spooky) perform a black mass (with a tape machine playing groovy spooky music) and end up re-awakening the count.
Turns out Johnny is a descendant of one of Dracula’s servants and has been waiting for the right moment – why 1972 is the one is never said.
Anyway – the film becomes Dracula among the hippies – and is pretty silly and dated and dull – it’s not as awful as other films on the Monster Times list of worst monster movies made but it really doesn’t work at all. Cushing does his usual good job – Lee while menacing doesn’t have enough to do (henchmen do most of the heavy lifting) and the ever lovely Caroline Murno is absolutely wasted as the count's first victim after the silly back mass .
I don’t know what the hell it is about the Hammer folks – all the heroines have to be blonde – you see a dark haired girl in the film – you know she’s dead meat. The Female lead by the way is supposed to be Peter Cushing’s granddaughter – but unless his son married a very blonde Swedish model I can’t see it. It’s not quite as a bad as Claude Rains being Lon Chaney’s father in the Wolf Man but its pretty bad.
Caroline is oddly enough best known for her role as Dr Phibes Dead wife in the two Dr. Phibes Movies. Well all she had to do was nothing which she did very well.
All told while Lee and Peter do their standard good job – or at least play it straight – the whole thing is just too much. The scene in the 60’s/70’s moved like lightning especially in England – hell by 72 it was metal and glam rock – not hippies. And the rest of the actors aren’t really very good – the women are pretty enough but the film really becomes kind of a weird too hip version of leave it to beaver “Beave did you raise Dracula from the dead and did he turn Wally into one of his undead servant?” “Yes mom” "well that means I'll have to drive a wooden stake through his heart, cut his head off and stuff his mouth full of garlic then. And that means I have go back to the store for more garlic and that means dinner will be late" "Sorry Mom" – it really does sound a bit like that.
Putting a vampire into a modern setting was done a lot better in the TV Movie The Night Stalker which was set in Los Vegas oddly enough in 1972. The advantage they had here was that the vampire wasn’t Dracula so they could allow the reporter time to put the case together rather than deal with the dull jabbering of Van Helsing (Peter tries but there isn’t a lot he can do with the lines he’s given).
Anyway off to go write the book of the musical (or start the damn thing) with The Enemy Below - tonight – I’ve never done this kind of writing before so it’s going to interesting a challenge really – I’m okay with one liners but otherwise? Not so hot. We’ll see what goes.
I understand the President had a little stomach trouble and was unable to join the rest of the leaders at the G-8 breakfast. Unkind minds say too drunk to leave the room.
As further poof that in this day and age you worst nightmare can come true at any moment a couple were fixing dinner when the door was smashed down – flash grenades when off and 15 heavily armed police from the narcotics squad bust in – in the resulting scuffle the husband was kicked in the groin and both husband and wife were handcuffed.
Later it was discovered the cops had hit the wrong address.
Peace, Love, Caroline Munro
Labels: bad movies -
posted by Unknown at 11:08 AM
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