And the Wheels
Just keep popping off – the current betting is Al “Waterboard” Gonzales will not be attorney general much longer – perhaps by the end of this week. The Justice department has issued some 3,000 e-mails that are involved with the AG firings and you have to suspect somewhere in that pile lurk a grenade or two.
One of the things that has changed with the internet is that as we speak there are 100’s of people going over each and every e-mail – and communicating with each other what they find. This is something new in the world meaning you really can’t hide things deep in a pile of documents.
The fact that both Tom Delay and Newt Gingrich are showing up on television and scaring children is proof that not only do you have to plunge a wooden stake through a vampire’s heart – you need to cut its head off and stuff its mouth full of garlic – check out Stoker’s Dracula for details – otherwise they walk the earth again.
Mets do not impress me in spring training. Still I need to get a new cap – my blue and black one from the last year died the death.
I remember when they brought out the new caps and shirts – I was standing on line to get the new blue and black cap when the woman in front of me said “I don’t like it, it could become a gang thing”
“They are going to have to play better.” I said – they went on to lose about 90+ games that year.
Boss out sick so this may be a bit shorter than normal – I’m passing on his messages from home to other folks – remember back when you were sick you were sick and that was it? Hell I’ve answered e-mails on vacation.
Curse of the Swamp creature sucks – and sucks rockets – it seems to be more of a quote MST3K not so much of a movie as a movie loaf – you have a mad scientist who is hiding in the swamps trying to make a monster – actually some kind of amphibian thing. He keeps failing and dropping off the bodies into the alligator pit.
Right off a couple of things – one – Gators, even a lot of gators don’t eat that much (there is a scene later with the Mad Scientist – hereinafter MS feeding them fish as well) – a good sized human being is going to keep a lot of them in the full reptile doze mode for a long time. And two, the question comes, why the hell is he doing this? Does this even make any damn sense at all? Would even a mad scientist do this? Granted madness explains a lot but really what’s the flipping’ point? But that’s B movies for you.
And then in a weird bit there is a sub plot involving an oil man who is killed in a seedy hotel room by the red neck boyfriend of the bad girl – she, boyfriend and I guess the owner of the hotel dispose of the body and plan to hook up with the oil Geologist who is coming in by plane. It is agreed that the Bad Girl (BG from now on natch) will pretend to be the dead oil guy’s wife (huh?)
No I don’t get it either – there is something about oil but it doesn’t make sense – I think it was just a way to get the BG and the redneck boyfriend out into the swamp – with our lifeless hero John Agar. (Barry the Geologist) and a useless guide.
Actually despite having the lead role in the credits – John (Barry –whatever) doesn’t do much, actually he doesn’t do anything at all. So we won’t be dealing with him much.
And once in the swamp the whole oil thing is dropped – we don’t know what was going on, or anything, the plot thread just wanders into the depths of the swamp to die.
There is much toing and frowing and padding and more padding – the MS uses his lab assistant (who had a momentary attack of guilt about using humans as subjects) as his next experiment – which gets him in bad with his wife – (relationship problems abound when you are a mad scientist) – at some point Barry, the useless guide, BG and the redneck boyfriend show up – there is talk – The wife shows up and talks the MS boasts about his shower – there is a very very fake voodoo hoodoo woo woo dance starting up nearby – The lab assistant dies (and is fed to the gators who by now must be saying “oh no not now I’m completely stuffed – really”) and the MS decides for reasons I’m not even going to try and understand, to use the bad girl as his next subject. The wife objects and is locked in a closet – Barry sleeps – the redneck wanders off to watch the dancing and decides to later rape one of the dancers, she eludes him and he dies in the quicksand – yep quicksand (maybe that's were the oil subplot ended up). A mob al la Frankenstein gathers at the MS house, the useless guide is shot, Barry wakes up, the MS urges his creation to life – it lives – Barry gets the wife out of the closet and then they go outside and confront the MS and the creature - who we haven’t seen before because it is just sooooo damned goofy you can’t help but laugh (see above - ping pong ball eyes I mean really). There is a weird confrontation between the wife and the MS as they fight for control of the creature (who looks real confused as they each yell at it things like “kill kill” “look what he did to you” ) Barry looks like he woke up and doesn’t say much – the creature decides to take out the doctor by tossing him in the alligator pit and then tosses itself in the pit and then the film ends with Barry and the Wife flying off in a small plane. Why? Damned if I know maybe they hooked up after the end of the action we saw who the hell knows and why care anyway – that’s what makes these films hurt you want them to make sense and they don’t, not a bit. The film is tedious and dull and badly acted and badly shot and sits on your head and bounces up and down and makes it hurt.
Then they roll the credits.
Last note – turns out the song on Frankenstein vs. the Space Monster was by the Scottish cult band the Poets who issued a few singles in the 60’s and vanished – how it ended up in that dog of a film is beyond me.
Peace Love Ping Pong Balls.
One of the things that has changed with the internet is that as we speak there are 100’s of people going over each and every e-mail – and communicating with each other what they find. This is something new in the world meaning you really can’t hide things deep in a pile of documents.
The fact that both Tom Delay and Newt Gingrich are showing up on television and scaring children is proof that not only do you have to plunge a wooden stake through a vampire’s heart – you need to cut its head off and stuff its mouth full of garlic – check out Stoker’s Dracula for details – otherwise they walk the earth again.
Mets do not impress me in spring training. Still I need to get a new cap – my blue and black one from the last year died the death.
I remember when they brought out the new caps and shirts – I was standing on line to get the new blue and black cap when the woman in front of me said “I don’t like it, it could become a gang thing”
“They are going to have to play better.” I said – they went on to lose about 90+ games that year.
Boss out sick so this may be a bit shorter than normal – I’m passing on his messages from home to other folks – remember back when you were sick you were sick and that was it? Hell I’ve answered e-mails on vacation.
Curse of the Swamp creature sucks – and sucks rockets – it seems to be more of a quote MST3K not so much of a movie as a movie loaf – you have a mad scientist who is hiding in the swamps trying to make a monster – actually some kind of amphibian thing. He keeps failing and dropping off the bodies into the alligator pit.
Right off a couple of things – one – Gators, even a lot of gators don’t eat that much (there is a scene later with the Mad Scientist – hereinafter MS feeding them fish as well) – a good sized human being is going to keep a lot of them in the full reptile doze mode for a long time. And two, the question comes, why the hell is he doing this? Does this even make any damn sense at all? Would even a mad scientist do this? Granted madness explains a lot but really what’s the flipping’ point? But that’s B movies for you.
And then in a weird bit there is a sub plot involving an oil man who is killed in a seedy hotel room by the red neck boyfriend of the bad girl – she, boyfriend and I guess the owner of the hotel dispose of the body and plan to hook up with the oil Geologist who is coming in by plane. It is agreed that the Bad Girl (BG from now on natch) will pretend to be the dead oil guy’s wife (huh?)
No I don’t get it either – there is something about oil but it doesn’t make sense – I think it was just a way to get the BG and the redneck boyfriend out into the swamp – with our lifeless hero John Agar. (Barry the Geologist) and a useless guide.
Actually despite having the lead role in the credits – John (Barry –whatever) doesn’t do much, actually he doesn’t do anything at all. So we won’t be dealing with him much.
And once in the swamp the whole oil thing is dropped – we don’t know what was going on, or anything, the plot thread just wanders into the depths of the swamp to die.
There is much toing and frowing and padding and more padding – the MS uses his lab assistant (who had a momentary attack of guilt about using humans as subjects) as his next experiment – which gets him in bad with his wife – (relationship problems abound when you are a mad scientist) – at some point Barry, the useless guide, BG and the redneck boyfriend show up – there is talk – The wife shows up and talks the MS boasts about his shower – there is a very very fake voodoo hoodoo woo woo dance starting up nearby – The lab assistant dies (and is fed to the gators who by now must be saying “oh no not now I’m completely stuffed – really”) and the MS decides for reasons I’m not even going to try and understand, to use the bad girl as his next subject. The wife objects and is locked in a closet – Barry sleeps – the redneck wanders off to watch the dancing and decides to later rape one of the dancers, she eludes him and he dies in the quicksand – yep quicksand (maybe that's were the oil subplot ended up). A mob al la Frankenstein gathers at the MS house, the useless guide is shot, Barry wakes up, the MS urges his creation to life – it lives – Barry gets the wife out of the closet and then they go outside and confront the MS and the creature - who we haven’t seen before because it is just sooooo damned goofy you can’t help but laugh (see above - ping pong ball eyes I mean really). There is a weird confrontation between the wife and the MS as they fight for control of the creature (who looks real confused as they each yell at it things like “kill kill” “look what he did to you” ) Barry looks like he woke up and doesn’t say much – the creature decides to take out the doctor by tossing him in the alligator pit and then tosses itself in the pit and then the film ends with Barry and the Wife flying off in a small plane. Why? Damned if I know maybe they hooked up after the end of the action we saw who the hell knows and why care anyway – that’s what makes these films hurt you want them to make sense and they don’t, not a bit. The film is tedious and dull and badly acted and badly shot and sits on your head and bounces up and down and makes it hurt.
Then they roll the credits.
Last note – turns out the song on Frankenstein vs. the Space Monster was by the Scottish cult band the Poets who issued a few singles in the 60’s and vanished – how it ended up in that dog of a film is beyond me.
Peace Love Ping Pong Balls.
Labels: bad movies -
posted by Unknown at 9:23 AM
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